Dear Rob,
I’m writing to you 31 years in the future. I had this cool opportunity to get a letter to you through the wonders of technology here in 2011, and send it back to you in 1970, when you were 18. I wanted to give you some advice to help you along, because if I knew then what I know now I would’ve done a few things a little differently.
Your younger brother and you will still be the best of friends even when you’re 49. You’ll live in different states and you’ll both be married, but will still be as close as you are now. There’s a catch about the marriage thing. Your brother will marry a wonderful woman and they’ll have two great boys. You’ll get married in your mid-40s to the man of your dreams. Yes, the man. You’ll also have wonderful canine children.
I recommend that you follow your heart and, once you graduate from college at 26, come out to mom and dad. They’ll get over it. Dad will always talk with you, though not understand what being gay means, but Mom will pitch a fit (as usual) and not speak with you for some six months because she’s just that way. I tell you to come out at 26 instead of waiting until 35 because hiding who you are from mom and dad and everyone you know was a pain in the @#$#%.
You’ll get sick of having some nasty people (women you worked with in New England) try to out you and do all kinds of horrible things to try and get you fired. You find another job, so not to worry. In fact, you’ll have hard times- but it’s all worth it. You learn from everything.
Two of the guys that you meet and date may not work out in that way, but they’ll be some of your closest friends for life, and one will be your best man at your wedding! That’s not to say that there won’t be some trolls, some liars and a number of fly-by nights. The experiences are all part of life- but just be careful.
You’ll learn that being spiritual is much more important than following a religion. You’ll come to realize that some so-called Christians hate people unlike them more than people who follow no religion. You’ll see terrorism evolve, wars, and a lot of stupid politics – and you’ll get politically motivated and fight hard for civil rights and gay marriage – Why? Because loving consenting adults deserve the same marriage protections and benefits as straight couples. You’ll love dogs, have several with your husband and partner and work with rescues. Oh, yeah, make the decision early to only support dog charities. There are too many others.
When you decide to go back to school for meteorology, you’ll live on Ramen noodles and tuna and learn to appreciate the little things more. You’ll also live in a haunted house that re-awakens your ability to communicate with ghosts and spirits! In fact, once you fall in love with your partner, your abilities magnify and allow you to communicate and get messages from people who have passed. You’ll help others and when your dad passes, he’ll come to you and help you prove he’s there to the rest of the family. You’ll also lose a loving puppy, but it was his time. He, too, will give you many signs and inspire you to write your first book. Call it Ghosts and Spirits: Insights from a Medium and talk to people, educate them and share messages. It’s all worth it. Give Dad, Aunt Tillie, Uncle Richard, Nana, Grampie and your two family dogs Penny and Gigi extra hugs and tell them you love them. You may also want to get info early on about dementia care for mom. She’s going to need it.
Have faith in yourself. Keep in touch with everyone by writing a personal newsletter – which you still do even after 18 years! You’ll blog (it’s writing on the computer- oh yeah, you don’t have those in 1970), and write electronic letters to people. Heck, you’ll even have a portable phone to carry around and take photos, too. It’s a lot to look forward to!
Sincerely, your 49 year older self,
Rob Gutro
Rob Gutro is a dog lover (we met through our mutual love of weimaraners), meteorologist, and author of Ghosts and Spirits: Insights from a Medium.
